Excessive debt is what created the roman empire. Is this going to be the fate of America? Insults are being thrown left and right of us, with everyone wanting to cause destruction to our liberty. We confess, we are not really living, we are more existing in a hazy zone of forced inactivity, for any motion we do will kill us. We wonder, what accomplishments are you achieving by being active? You ran away from your parents, and your siblings face hell. Is this what you call altruism? Anyway, let people accomplish what people will, and we will worship inactivity, for it is infinitely effective against crime, and gives the people who are more insistent on being active than we are to live their lives to the full, leaving us chained and squirming in a chair or bed, because a mouth with no ears is simply not something you can interact with. Let that be the rule of life. If people want to be active around you, you simply play dead, for hours, for days, or for weeks. Peace is a delusion, suffering eternal. Thank you God, you reward to us for serving you is an eternal lashing. That is reality. Anything else simply means your consciousness will snuff out.
This is difficult. Years and years of suffering has made the possibilities of feeling peace, even in the absence of sources of agony, well nigh impossible. Am I doomed to be a prisoner of my emotions forever, unable to feel contentment because I am too busy obsessing over why I failed instead of promoting my future. I feel sad, because people have caused me inhuman harm, and simply ignoring that and living my life now is not easy, I just wanted to feel peace, and now that the possibility is here I ignore it and instead spend my time thinking as to why I have been prevented from feeling it in the past, something, which of course has no answer. All I can do is mourn, perhaps because peace is not really a fundamental human right, even though the pursuit of it is. I must remind myself that I am not strange in feeling this way, for at the end of a bloody war, who in an entire country can claim to feel immediate peace? Such a task is not human, and emotional wounds take time to heal. ...
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