Schizophrenia is threatening us. Of all the multifarious traps and pitfalls to be found in life, how are we meant to sort ourselves? We are under threat from a great tragedy, that has thus far destroyed any sense of peace that we could be having, and that is the threat of happiness. When we try to fix that problem, we end up facing such a molasses of sin that we end up not being able to do anything, and when we sort out both these issues, we end up facing the dangers of schizophrenia. Truly, there is no escape. The additional problem or topic that we face is the topic of location. If things were morally perfect, the office would be the ideal place to be, but things are rarely moral for longer than a few hours at most, and these days, even a minute of peace seems lucky. Writing at home feels dead, for, in all honesty, nothing you do in a place that is none work related can be considered work, and really, only a sick man spends time at home if he is at the prime of his life and doesn’t have a marriage family. But we have no choice, for the stability required to create an effective work environment simply doesn’t exist. Help us.
This is difficult. Years and years of suffering has made the possibilities of feeling peace, even in the absence of sources of agony, well nigh impossible. Am I doomed to be a prisoner of my emotions forever, unable to feel contentment because I am too busy obsessing over why I failed instead of promoting my future. I feel sad, because people have caused me inhuman harm, and simply ignoring that and living my life now is not easy, I just wanted to feel peace, and now that the possibility is here I ignore it and instead spend my time thinking as to why I have been prevented from feeling it in the past, something, which of course has no answer. All I can do is mourn, perhaps because peace is not really a fundamental human right, even though the pursuit of it is. I must remind myself that I am not strange in feeling this way, for at the end of a bloody war, who in an entire country can claim to feel immediate peace? Such a task is not human, and emotional wounds take time to heal. ...
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