Our heart palpitates in fear of ourselves. Will I raise my hand, and give the order for a nuclear bomb to be detonated near my heart? How many fingers on this earth are hovering over all these buttons that would launch nuclear weapons currently? Let me tell you that the nuclear nonproliferation treaty was signed when enough nuclear weapons were built to be able to destroy humanity by fallout, because suddenly nobody saw any point in being more destructive than that. You are weak, for you care not an ounce for anything that promotes seriousness, when you should realize that your gravity is more important than your people, for if you just want to help your people, you will deteriorate when the possibility for expansion arises, but if you care for your dignity, then you will make earth one nation, letting yourself get scourged whenever a smear of mania sets in. Rule the world, will you? But I am greater than you, for you face the electric chair after eight years, whereas we get rewarded, not punished, for serving our people and humanity. You mad, sick, lunatic. You house is a sanatorium, with thousands of doctors, but one patient.
This is difficult. Years and years of suffering has made the possibilities of feeling peace, even in the absence of sources of agony, well nigh impossible. Am I doomed to be a prisoner of my emotions forever, unable to feel contentment because I am too busy obsessing over why I failed instead of promoting my future. I feel sad, because people have caused me inhuman harm, and simply ignoring that and living my life now is not easy, I just wanted to feel peace, and now that the possibility is here I ignore it and instead spend my time thinking as to why I have been prevented from feeling it in the past, something, which of course has no answer. All I can do is mourn, perhaps because peace is not really a fundamental human right, even though the pursuit of it is. I must remind myself that I am not strange in feeling this way, for at the end of a bloody war, who in an entire country can claim to feel immediate peace? Such a task is not human, and emotional wounds take time to heal. ...
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